自闭之魔

oy

背景....

oy

manyou，

期待你的更多的经验之谈。我很感激你的回贴。
想私下和你联系，请查你的短信息。

-OY

oy

manyou，

期待你的更多的经验之谈。我很感激你的回贴。
想私下和你联系，请查你的短信息。

-OY

manyou

oy,

我们已经和公立学校系统打了三年半的交道,其中的酸甜苦辣我会慢慢写在这里,或许从中你可以借鉴一些经验.

我们全家来美时,儿子已经三岁多了,但是还没有开口说出一个有意义的字.妈妈不愿意我把儿子带到美国来,因为换一个全新的语言环境对这样的孩子太困难了.你可以想象我们心中的不安和焦虑.来美之前,儿子已经在国内上了半年的幼儿园,虽然在幼儿园一个字不说,但是可能比较听话,没有什么突出的行为问题(其实后来回想还是有一些怪异,只是不特别显眼吧),生活基本自理,老师并没有太多的抱怨.来美后因为我们都有全职工作,送儿子去DAYCARE是唯一的选择,当时的我不想放弃自己从事了多年的专业研究.不过一到美国我们就开始带儿子进行各种检查.当时的儿子AUTISM 的评估在临界分数,不过医生告诉我们如果他给确定的诊断,我们当时的HEALTH INSURANCE 可以负担全部的语言和OT治疗费用.那时的我对美国的一切一无所知,更是囊中羞涩,一听说免费是求之不得.儿子来美一个多月后就开始了他的幼儿园生活,只哭了一天以后,就被幼儿园里不计其数的玩具吸引,连我觉得难以下咽的美国饭菜也逐渐适应了,我从心里感激儿子克服了许多困难,没有给我太多的麻烦.

两个月后我们开始在著名的医学中心的语言治疗,每周两次,每次一小时,我们都选在早上八点钟,这样结束后把儿子送到DAYCARE,我们可以继续工作.由于孩子应人能很差,加上语言不通,开始的语言治疗效果并不好.其实我当时对这样的治疗不抱太大希望,我只想学习如何和这种没有语言的孩子进行交流,他应该学习什么东西.最开始就是SIGN LANGUAGE和PICTURE LANGUAGE.我们全程观看语言训练,每节课后,训练师会给我们一堆的材料,图片和各种训练口腔肌肉的小玩具,让我们在家继续训练.三个月后儿子说出了第一个有意义的词,不知道是儿子自己水到渠成,还是语言训练的结果,抑或兼而有之.这样的训练持续了一年半左右,儿子5岁了,还不能说完整的句子,发音清晰度也不好,即使YES或NO,不熟悉的人也未必能听懂,该上KINDERGARDEN了,我们开始转入了公立学校系统.(待续)

oy

昨天开了会。EI对宝贝重新评估（上次评估是一年之前），学区的负责人来我们家，观察宝贝观察EI的评估。

oypf

宝贝,想到你,我就流泪.你是我们家的第一个宝贝,为什么这种不幸会降落在我们家里.
宝贝是幸运的,有这么坚强\这么有爱心的爸爸妈妈.
我相信宝贝会好起来了.
祝愿爸爸妈妈身体健康,全家快乐

binfeng2000

书店里有那些Flash Cards卖的,可以试试.

oy

今天我们母子在电脑屏幕上输字玩。妈妈让输入“bed",宝贝竟然输入了”bird";妈妈让输入“sun",宝贝竟然输入了"son".妈妈很惊讶，爸爸妈妈没有教过宝贝怎么拼写这两个单词，宝贝怎么知道的？是不是平时识别卡片时自己注意了并且记忆下来了？既然自己记忆了这两个，那么是不是还应该记得其他的单词的拼写呢？

妈妈一直感觉，宝贝的视觉记忆不错，妈妈该怎么利用这个优点进行训练呢？

oy

今天，M女士来我们家里访问。她是附近某个自闭组织的工作人员。很热心，给我们讲了她孩子的故事，很鼓动人。更让我们感激的，她愿意免费为我们作advocate，以后在宝贝的IEP会议上为我们据理力争。－－－爸爸妈妈千恩万谢，感动不已。

和S女士联系上了。她的孩子有自闭诊断，正在宝贝以后要去的学校上学。她给我提供的任何信息，都是有价值的参考信息。寻寻觅觅，终于找到一个真正意义上在一个战"hao2毫”里的战友了，而且是一个热心肠的人。

和自闭作斗之后，有了很多很多我感激不尽的人。但愿，我也能有心有力助人，给同行人提供帮助。



以上文本借助www.InputKing.com在线中文输入法输入

niuniu2007

"带班的老师很NICE, 给他找了个温顺的女伴".
---好棒的老师，好棒的安排。很多学校配成人助理，但是当然是同龄伙伴最好，很难找的，要有自愿者.

"因为儿子热衷于各种BOARD GAME, 这是他和男孩最多的交往手段了".
---就是这个原因，有的文章说男孩自闭症比女孩更容易融入社交，因为什么下棋啊，电玩啊，自闭不自闭的都喜欢，混在一起玩，有很多融入的机会。女孩就惨了，不仅没有这些，女孩的小集体，小心眼，都比男孩复杂得多，对自闭女孩很是挑战。当年我看到这个文章的时候，很难过了一阵子。但也为男孩子的父母高兴啊。

manyou，欢迎你有空再多来逛逛，介绍好经验。

oy

manyou:

非常感谢你提供的信息和鼓励。。。。

manyou

几天没有来这里, 所以没有回复你的留言. 我其实很懒, 有时间时常常看电视剧, 也懒得敲字. 有空可以浏览一下这个网站.
http://www.learningresources.com/home.do?code=OATOY

我发现很多学校都买这个公司的玩具, 价格比较贵一些, 不过它可以给你一些想法, 你可以买其他类似但便宜的玩具.
我儿子现在恢复得比我的期望值要好. 以前我们的目标是他能够自食其力, 现在考虑也许可以去接受更好的教育.  他现在全天自己在普通班上课, 阅读差一些, 数学优秀. 有很强的SOCIAL 愿望, 但是缺乏技巧, 语言表达也比同龄人差.带班的老师很NICE, 给他找了个温顺的女伴. 因为儿子热衷于各种BOARD GAME, 这是他和男孩最多的交往手段了.

很多人认为美国学业负担轻, 我觉得不完全这样. 从儿子这几年上学的经历看, 美国是因材施教, 每个学校的宗旨是发挥individual talents, 而不是每个人都要争名次或分数. 我儿子现在二年级一年的课业是: 英语教材两本16开本的大书, 每本书近400页.
一本科学教材300多页, 一本社会学教材300多页. 一本数学400多页.极其 浩大的阅读量. 无论在哪个学科上学有余力的孩子,老师会额外给予更难的阅读材料, 美国的优秀人才就是这样一步步走出来的. 但是对于那些跟不上的孩子老师绝不会伤害孩子一点自尊, 会自动降低难度, 只要孩子和自己比有进步,老师都是赞赏有加. 二年级写作课已经开始学写BOOK REPORT, POEM, RESEARCH REPORT, WRITING JOURNAL 则是每天的必修课. 但是这里没有任何死记硬背的东西, 几乎没有抄写作业. 阅读对数学也很重要, 因为所有的数学测试都是测试PROBLEM SOLVING 能力, 而不是单纯测试孩子是否知道3+2.

啰嗦了一堆, 希望对你有一点点帮助. 也许对于我们这样的孩子,单纯地弥补他们的缺陷, 不如适度地发现发挥特长,也许会成为他们的一技之长而求生存. 孩子的进步常常会走过一漫长的平台期, 你真的要忍耐! 坚持一下, 再坚持一下, 说起来容易做起来真的很难, 祝福你.
有空再谈.

kwenma2

很温馨哦!!

oy

弟弟一直喜欢和宝贝争夺玩具，宝贝很紧张。不过，宝贝很善良，从来不打弟弟。即使弟弟喜欢用手轻轻拍宝贝的头，宝贝也从来不还手。

今天，妈妈陪着宝贝和弟弟在训练室里玩。不知怎么的，这一次，弟弟不再争抢哥哥的玩具，而是拿起哥哥喜欢的数字block，一个一个的给哥哥。弟弟递一个，宝贝接一个，弟弟再递一个，宝贝再接一个。这样几个回合，宝贝突然主动凑过去，抱着弟弟的头亲吻了一下。这样玩了又一会，宝贝又过去抱着弟弟吻了一下。

那一刻，妈妈的心都化了，眼睛也湿润了。宝贝儿，那温柔的举动背后，是不是有很复杂的情感体验呢？妈妈不知道你脑袋里是怎么想的。是不是也在欣赏感激弟弟的好表现呢？

oy

melon妈妈：

几个家长私下里给我写信安慰，如同你说的一样，孩子在慢慢变，随着长大孩子慢慢会变好一些。最后的breakthrough，其实很大取决于孩子自身的发展。你们这些走在前面的人的话，会给我很大的安慰与信心。怎么做好父母，我们也在学习思考调整。谢谢你们！

melon

看你写大宝小宝就像是２年前的甜瓜，不过现在真的好多了。

另外就在对待孩子方面，看得出你们两口子都特别爱孩子（大小宝很幸运啊），但是该FIRM的时候也得FIRM。这个不是吼他们，而是很平静，但是很认真地跟他们说‘LISTEN','LOOK AT ME', 'NO'....

oy

“只要是functional play,管它是小孩该玩的还是大人该玩的。只要动脑了，就可以。”如果真的如你所说的那样，也就好了。可是我家孩子不是这样的。

比如带他去Playgroup,他就喜欢看着那个屋子里的两个“Exit”标志发笑，看屋子里的挂钟发笑，然后在阶梯上爬上爬下。在家里，在厅里跑来跑去，摇头晃脑，或者去玩微波炉，打开关上，风扇打开停掉。或者玩一按按钮就出声音的玩具，按，听，再按，再听。数字玩具呢，以前还有规律摆放，现在是乱弄一气。玩电脑，以前也是有点意义地输入数字字母，现在也是乱输一气了。有个leapfrog游戏机，可以涂颜色可以玩小兔过河。。。我试图教他，他比我还快，只要我有企图，就马上把游戏机关掉。我就说他现在越来越倒退，拒绝用脑子了。

正因为他对很多东西不感兴趣，训练起来很struggle，需要不停地把他拉过来，强迫他做一做。我老公说他没有点子，不知道怎么训练，我说我有的是点子，可是很多东西在宝贝身上没有共鸣response。苦于没有特别吸引宝贝的点子。

看别人家的文章，总觉得别人的孩子很听话，让练球就练球，让作手工就作手工。。。。。程度好的和父母还有简单对话。我们的孩子，太不合作了。他不哭，他不闹，他就是忽略你或者要跑开。

我们夫妻都很宠孩子，训斥他两句心里都自责难受。可是有时候看他那么不听指令不合作，真觉得我们应该给他一点颜色看看。小时候不在他面前有权威，长大之后估计更难了。我自认为自己做不到“权威”，就对老公说你严厉一点吧，至少让宝贝服从一个人。可是他也觉得宝贝可怜，不狠心。。。。作慈父慈母容易，作有智慧的严父严母难啊。

niuniu2007

说到你家宝贝对玩具不functional play，和我们家儿子一样。他也是从小就对各种玩具都不感兴趣，但是却对大人的东西感兴趣：如收音机了，车里的音响系统了，什么的。他经常偷偷的吧我的电脑总开关给关上，还得我常丢失未储存文件，还经常把车里的手闸给抬起来，害得我不知道还开车，把手闸搞坏了。音响系统的开关功能都搞得一清二楚。甚至，有一次陪姐姐去医院，在急诊室待了1个小时，那个病床怎么抬高，怎么固定，心电图脉搏显示仪，他也都看在眼里，医生出去后还向我示范询问。
所以，也是在幼儿园里什么也不玩，就对教室里的放音机感兴趣，还有电扇，做做颜色数字的练习，故事也基本听不进去，英文也没学会说，略微能听懂些。不过，在学校发生的事都零星的主动的讲出来，说明也没有一点也不注意环境。
我因为只能顾一头，知道儿子有点自闭倾向，也管不了了。

我是想说让他们玩大人的“玩具”或许是个alternative.只要是functional play,管它是小孩该玩的还是大人该玩的。只要动脑了，就可以。

oy

Fine Motor Activities

! Drawing on a vertical surface promotes development of fine motor control in young children. You may want to tape a piece of paper to the fridge (easier to wipe off stray marks) or use an easel.

! Provide large size pencils, crayons and chalk and large surfaces to color, paint or draw on: big pieces of paper, sidewalks with sidewalk chalk, etc. (See illustrations)

! Hole punches and scissors come in lots of different designs, such as squiggly lines and different shapes. Using a hole punch can strengthen hands and using different, fun tools sometimes makes a difficult task more rewarding.

! Games like “Bedbugs” require the use of plastic tongs which strengthen hands and develop the child’s fine motor skills. Using tweezers and medicine droppers for picking up things is fun and develops hand control

! Make necklaces or jewelry or gifts using macaroni strung onto a lace or glued onto a container. You can help the child spray with gold or silver spray paint and add glitter, or paint with poster paints or food coloring.

! Working with clay and play dough strengthens hands and develops fine motor skills. Using real dough can be very interesting for children. For example, let the child knead and shape bread or pizza dough to make their own hamburger bun or pizza. (See clay recipe)

! At celebration times, your child may be interested in making cards to give to family members and friends. A wide variety of papers and embellishments (feathers, pompoms, glitter, stickers, etc.) are available to make a fancy card.

! Make a picture frame by gluing popsicle sticks onto a piece of cardboard and inserting a picture. Your child may have fun gluing rocks, pine cones, etc. onto the frame to decorate it.

! Use stencils for your child to trace and make pictures and designs

! Make placemats out of construction paper for everyday and for special events. Your child can cut out objects from magazines or catalogs and glue them to the placemat to personalize it. (You can preserve the placemat by covering it with clear “Contact” paper) Napkin rings can be easily made to match by cutting sections of a paper tube and decorating it.

! Give your child a plain paper bag to decorate for a gift bag.

! Writing in shaving cream: spray shaving cream onto the table or a baking sheet. Let your child finger paint with it. You can add drops of food coloring to make the design more fun. (See shampoo paint recipe which follows)

! Ask your child to help you cook. Stirring, spreading, placing objects are all good fine motor activities.

!Display your child’s creations prominently.

!Cover the bottom of a pan or plastic container with a layer of sand or cornmeal. Your child can use his/her finger or a stick to “write” in the sand.

! Markers and crayons come in all kinds of fun styles. Some have shapes on the end to use as stamps, and some are scented.

! Make paper airplanes ! Give your beginning scissors user card weight junk mail to learn to cut. They can “shred” you junk mail for you while learning to use their hands.

Make learning fun—do interesting projects focusing on your child’s interests. For example, if your child is interested in dinosaurs, you can make a dinosaur picture with torn paper and shapes to represent the dinosaur habitat. Finish with dinosaur stickers.

Many more ideas are available on the internet and at the public library!

Play dough
3 cups flour
1 cup salt
1 cup water
1/4 cup oil
2 Tablespoons vinegar


Mix all ingredients well. Add more water if needed, but avoid making too wet to handle. Knead until smooth. Keep in a tightly closed container or bag.

Clay to make beads
3/4 cup flour 1/2 cup salt 1/2 cup cornstarch warm water Mix dry ingredients together. Gradually add warm water until the mixture can be kneaded into shape. Make beads by rolling into little balls, piercing the balls with a toothpick or knitting needle and allowing the balls to dry. Paint the bead. Allow to dry and string them when thoroughly dry. (Does not store well—use as soon as you make it.)

Cornstarch Fun Mixture (Make this with your kids; it is fun to watch!)
1/2 cup cornstarch 1/4 cup water food coloring

teaspoon measuring spoon small plastic container

Place cornstarch into container. Slowly add water, 1 teaspoon at a time. Stir the mixture after each time you add water. Feel it with your hands.

Continue adding water until the mixture is a thick paste. Observe changes as you add the water. Without mixing them in, add 3 drops of food coloring (may be the same or different colors). Observe as the colors mix into the cornstarch.

Finger Paint 1
Put a few drops of food coloring into some plain yogurt (buy the cheapest kind for this activity—you won’t be eating it.) This dries to a shiny surface.

Finger Paint 2
1/2 cup cornstarch 3/4 cup cold water 2 cups hot water 2 teaspoons mouthwash as preservative 1 Tablespoon glycerin (at crafts stores or pharmacy)

Mix cornstarch and 1/4 cup water in a saucepan to make a paste. Add hot water, stirring to prevent lumps. Cook over low heat until mixture begins to boil. Remove from heat and stir in 1/2 cup cold water and the mouthwash. Divide and pour into jars. Add food coloring and stir to mix. Keep tightly closed.

Shampoo paint (cheaper than shaving cream and just as much fun)
3 teaspoons shampoo and a small amount of water. Whip with an electric mixer until it is thick and creamy. Add food coloring if you want to.

oy

Remember, young children learn best when doing “hands on” activities
with someone who cares about them.

1. Cue your child to listen to you and to look at you when you give an
instruction—sometimes children don’t follow an instruction because they
haven’t really focused on what you are saying.

2. Praise your child for listening and following directions. (“Wow, Mary, you
really listened and remembered to do both of the things I asked!” rather
than “Good girl, Mary”.)

3. Play Find It—ask your child to get two or three things and bring them to
you, or ask them to follow two or three step directions with some small
toys. For example, you could ask her to get her Teddy Bear, blanket and
favorite book and bring them to the couch, and reward her with a story
and a cuddle. Or, you could have several small toys and containers and ask
her to follow directions such as “Touch the block, put the ball in the box,
and give me the doggy,” building up to three steps.

4. Play “Concentration”. You can buy or make the cards yourself:
Paste pairs pictures or stickers to the backs of 3x5 cards or squares
of paper—you’ll need about 10 to 15 sets of cards. Lay the cards face
down on the table and take turns picking up one card, looking at it and
then turning over another card to see if it matches. As you turn over
the cards, your child should start to remember where the matching
card is located. Start with as few as six sets and gradually increase
the number of pairs of cards you use as your child learns the game,
and her memory skills improve.

5. There are some commercially available “Memory” games available: Pooh
Memory and Turtle Memory are just two.

6. Read stories with your child and ask her what happened to the characters
in the story.

7. Make a sequencing activity. You can get children’s story books at St.
Vincent’s or Goodwill or garage sales. Cut the pages of a familiar story,
such as the 3 Bears, apart, and have your child put them in the sequence
of the story. Start with 3 pictures, for example, 1 showing Goldilocks
coming to the Bears’ home, 1 showing her breaking the chair and then a
picture of the Bears coming home and finding her asleep. As your child
learns the activity, you can increase the number of steps to about 8.

8. Teach your child to do something which has several steps. For example,
teach her how to make a sandwich. Give instructions for two or three
steps at a time, for example, put the bread and peanut butter on the
counter and get a knife from the drawer.

9. Start a journal with your child. Sit down with your child in the evening
and talk about her day. She can draw a picture highlighting a favorite
activity, and you can write a word or two at the bottom, like “Playing with
Julie” She will learn to recall events which happened earlier in the day
and it is a nice way to share and wind down at the end of the day.

10. Switch roles and ask your child to give you directions or lead a game.
You can be silly and pretend to forget what to do next and have your child
remind you.

11. Ask your child to tell you things about familiar objects, places or people
which are not in view at the time. For example, “Tell me three things
about our car.”

12. Ask your child to name things from a common category, for example,
“Tell me all of the animals you can think of” Other categories would
include shapes, colors, articles of clothing, names, body parts, toys, etc.

13. Build memory and thinking skill activities into daily routines, for
example remembering what things need to be done when it is bathtime, or
what steps to take when helping Mommy bake cookies.