[第7集] 逆境还是机遇? 中讲的cognitive therapy(认知疗法):比其他方法都有效,已证明对大多数精神学病例,多数焦虑忧郁症状,最成功,且最迅速起作用的方法.
3M[非理性想法的3个陷阱. magnifying(放大),minimizing(缩小),Making up or fabricating(无中生有).]
.
benefit-finder and fault-finder (积极者和消极者)
认知重建是学习乐观理性地诠释所发生的事
03,04
适应力( Resilience)
花3节课讨论设定目标(goal setting)
goal setting是resilience的重要组成部分.
Ordinary characteris,extraordinary results
--Optimism
--Faith and a sense of meaning
--pro-social behabior(利社会行为),帮助他人
--Focus on strengths/有榜样\不单干有社会的支持(或者一两个人/有
--Set goals
--A role model
--Social support: 父母或朋友,这是适应力最重要的一点.找到合适的人People who ,when you are reach out to them,will reach back to you and will be able to give back.
Mava Collins 的故事
承认弱点的勇气/
05:体验消极情绪时,我们的意识思维narrows and constricts(变窄收紧),be focus on one thing(专注于一件事), if continue to narrows and constricts(如果继续变窄收紧),就会进入下行螺旋,恶性循环.最终导致depression(抑郁).
积极情绪相反,Broad and build----积极情绪---- Broad and build….眼界变宽,关注其他事.思考现在我能做什么?我能去哪里?我把时间用在哪里?
积极情绪可以是:看滑稽电影,一次深呼吸,与朋友交流.可以带离下行螺旋进入上行螺旋.实现转移.
06.乐观主义:积极环境映射(priming)
Making up or fabricating(无中生有):个人化或归咎于他人。在受虐待的人身上经常看到。受虐待的妻子经常说:“这是我的错。”而不是说:“这个人虐待我,我得离开。”或我考得差,怪在男朋友或女朋友头上。都是不现实的。
最后是情感的推理。我嫉妒别人,所以我一定是坏人。在试镜时遇到危险,那一定是危险的。选取一种情绪,让它成为现实,而不是把一种情绪(情感)只当成情绪(情感),不必符合现实,是对现实的评估。
关键是真实化。如何通过我们的提问变真实?几个例子,下去自己练习。
“我的结论和现实紧密相关吗?”“那合理吗?我忽略了什么重要的事?”
结果: 一个月后感觉和身体
最糟糕的经历 1和2组变好,3组变坏
最好的经历 相反
Why?
the difference of analyzing and replaying
analyzing对改善最糟糕的经历的心理有好处。
Replaying 最好的经历
9.积极情绪
写下你喜欢要感激地事物和人
Change的层次:1。培养一个习惯,比如能每周锻炼3次,几周后,,锻炼的好处和吃心理药物相当。
or习惯I want to introduce spirituality to my life.
Or I want to be happier.
Or I want to experience less anxiety.
10.how to change
幸福由以下因素决定:
遗传50%
外部环境10%
人的意向活动40%-----人的意向活动
人的意向活动:人的所作所为所想,人对世界的诠释和我们关注的焦点,ABCs
幸福课的内容就是讲这方面的改变的.
Affect Behavior Cognition
Gradually
Mindful meditation
冥想
acute Peak experience
高峰体验 将自己置于strench zone
Affect:
1. Gradually- Mindful meditation ( 00:22:40------- 00:32 meditation)
the foundation of the spiral of mindfulness.
“Cultivating mindfulness can lead to the discovery of deep realms of relaxation,calmness and insight within yourself.通向这个境界的路径就在你的体内脑中和你自己的呼吸里这就是专注力的奇妙之处。研究结果:通过专注于呼吸和身体的某个部位,通过亲临现场,改变了我们的思维方式,改造了我们的大脑。)所有人都有专注的能力。关键在于开发我们在此时此刻全神贯注的能力
<<情感炼金术>>”专注力意味着看到事物的本来面目,而不是试图改变它们,关键是要消解我们对负面情绪的反应,而不是抵制情绪。This is what permission to be human is all about.
研究结果表明:Within as little as 8 weeks of regular meditation, Our brain actually starts to change its form to transform.our immune system strengthens It does not have to be 5 hrs a day.As little as 30minutes or 20minutes a day can already affect change.这个过程是缓慢的。Life long intervention(8周的冥想就会改变大脑。)
2. Peak experience
高峰体验
Mindful meditation:带来calm and tranquim
Cultivating Mindfulness can lead to the discovery of deep realms of relaxation, calmness and insight within yourself. The path to it lies no farther than your own body, your mind and your breathing. This is the amazing thing about mindfulness.(专注力的奇妙之处)
通过专注于呼吸,可以改变我们的思维方式,改造我们的大脑。每人都有专注力.
Peak experience:
创伤后,很多人的一生因为创伤后应激障碍(PTSD)而改变了。它改变了大脑中的化学物质和大脑结构,建立了新的神经通路。破坏了很多以前的神经通路。而那一次经历就像大锤一挥。越南战争海湾战争老兵。
911前,纽约110号大街以南,2万人有PTSD,911后,6万。这个影响了大脑的功能,这种影响很多时候是伴随终生的。
但有些人拥有创伤后成长。世事总有不幸,但有人can make the best of things that happen.能从中成长其实很多人是有能力承受创伤的。当人们关注事物带来的益处时,他就会产生创伤后成长。
创伤怎么带来成长呢?
特别的经历.有的妇女生孩子,性情大变.聆听音乐,音乐常会让人体验Peak experience
Behavior:学习了这门课的人,大部分人幸福度会升高,然后回落到基点;少数人基点会提高,因为这部分人在课程刚开始时立即着手实施实质上的行为改变。
态度影响行为,行为同样影响态度,双行道。
所有的课程都是改变态度。这门课:
self-esteem,
benefit finder-fault finder.
Perfectionism: it’s an attitude towards failure.
让大家做出态度上的改变,但同时态度的改变要落实到行为的改变,否则,不会有改变。
行为的改变:gratitude,
Face feed back作者: 轻纱曼舞 时间: 2012-10-30 07:21 标题: re:possitive psychology... possitive psychology(八)
11:养成良好习惯
靠self-dicipline不如靠养成习惯,因为self-dicipline量是有限的.
巧克力脆饼实验:刚开始用尽了自律,后面就没多少自律可用了.
New Year Resolution---不能坚持,因为要靠自律,而刷牙每人都会做----因为习惯,automatically.
建立例行公事. 一个月建立一件ritual(例行公事).
建立例行公事需要大量自律,所以一个月不要建立2件以上ritual(例行公事).
建立例行公事,一开始消耗大量自律,但一旦开始,一个月后他已成习惯,已成刻骨铭心.接着可以建立下一件ritual.
如果没有行为改变,就没有改变.
逐步的改变好过雄心勃勃的失败.
Rituals are 非常重要.
ABC中的C:cognition
认知重建:interpretation is a neural pathway.
Twin父亲酗酒暴力,twin中一个象父亲,另一个完全相反. 对父亲之事的interpretation不同.
4天,每次15分钟,写the most difficult experience
1. most upsetting or traumatic experience of your life,写出最深刻的想法和感受,
2. 事件必须是对你有深刻影响的
3. you have not talked about with others in detail.
It’s very difficult to touch those deepest emotions and thouguts that you have.
以上包括ABC三要素.
A:写出what happened
B:behaviour,write about your deepest feelings-your affect,your emotions.
C:And write about your thought and analyze it.
他们刚开始焦虑水平上升,后来下降到对照组以下,变得更健康.会更阳光.
写日记 男性比女性受益更多.
试验:
3天,每次15分钟,写the most wonderful experience or experiences in your life,happiest moments,ecstatic moments,moments of rapture,perhaps from being in love,or from listening to music,or suddenly “being hit”,
好的经历:describing and replaying,而不应该分析.这样人会变得快乐.这和写痛苦经历不同.
受益最大的人士那些introduxe a lot of insight(领悟性) words,or insight phrases,
I realize that.我突然明白了,or 我意识到等等,使用这些词最多的人,受益最大.因为创造了coherence,这经历不再是零散的无关的片段.是一个连续的故事,现在我可以面对它了.
研究那些比别人健康的人,发现这些人:
Sense of coherence
People have the sense of coherence about their life,最确定的因素有3:
1. 理解力sense of comprehensibility—I understand the world.我感觉得到,我理解他the world,events,difficultie,hardships,highs and lows make sense to me mostly
2. sense of manageability.I can deal with it .I can handle it.I have the internal as well as external resources to deal with it as apposed to helpless.This is a sense of efficacy, of confidence being able to deal with hardships that arise.
3. sense of meaningfulness.困难的出现不是毫无意义的.意见不合不是坏事,可以更好地了解对方.更亲密了.我会从中成长,学到东西.
一种整体适应性(a global orientation that expresses external ,the extent to which one has a pervasive,enduring though dynamic feeling of confidenxe that )主要包括3方面(1)在生命中个体感受到来自内外部环境的压力是明确具体可预测的(即领悟性)
,the stimuli deriving from one’s internal and external environments in the course of living are structured,predictable and explicable(comprehensible)
(2) 个体感受到应对内外部环境的压力 所需资源是充分的
the resourse are available to one to meet the demands posed by these stimuli(internal resources and external resources:I can deal with it ,I can manage)
(3)个体感受到来自内外部环境的压力具有挑战性,值得花时间和精力去应对.these demands are challenges,worthy of investment and engagement(it’s meaningful)
对写日记的人来说,在日记里能找到这3点,有coherence.I can deal with it.I can handle it.
强烈推荐写日记.
总结改变这一课:ABC
Because habit is like a flood.会冲走一切。需结合ABand C.将这些变化引入我们的生活中。它们是内部相连的。
Goal setting:下面2节课讲目标的重要性,以及目标如何帮我们处理压力,how to 处理拖延问题,how to 变得更有效率.
目标设定:
1.Understand the theory and the practice of goal setting,
2.how to deal with stress
目标设定的重要性,不管是工作还是私生活,都应设定目标.
(1) 设定目标与工作效能的研究
(2) 设定目标与幸福的研究
设定目标的人往往掌控其它事也比较成功.目标.why?
因为目标能使我们专注,通常,我们四处奔波,不知道方向,就不可能达到目的地..专注能让我们找到方向.这能带来额外资源,内部和外部资源,帮助我们达成目的.
目标让我们更有幸福感,让我们更有适应能力.future-oriented(48;16s)
When we know what for,every how becomes possible.我们更能克服困难.
充分理解目标的正确作用:不是达到目标使人幸福,而是拥有目标使人幸福/
幸福不是登上山峰,也不是在山的周围没有方向地乱爬,幸福是向山峰攀登的过程,它与设定目标有关,and then let going and enjoying the process.作者: 轻纱曼舞 时间: 2012-10-30 07:23 标题: re:possitive psychology... possitive psychology(九)
12.日记
4天,每次15分钟,写the most difficult experience
1. most upsetting or traumatic experience of your life,写出最深刻的想法和感受,
2. 事件必须是对你有深刻影响的
3. you have not talked about with others in detail.
It’s very difficult to touch those deepest emotions and thouguts that you have.
以上包括ABC三要素.
A:写出what happened
B:behaviour,write about your deepest feelings-your affect,your emotions.
C:And write about your thought and analyze it.
他们刚开始焦虑水平上升,后来下降到对照组以下,变得更健康.会更阳光.
写日记 男性比女性受益更多.
试验:
3天,每次15分钟,写the most wonderful experience or experiences in your life,happiest moments,ecstatic moments,moments of rapture,perhaps from being in love,or from listening to music,or suddenly “being hit”,
好的经历:describing and replaying,而不应该分析.这样人会变得快乐.这和写痛苦经历不同.
受益最大的人士那些introduxe a lot of insight(领悟性) words,or insight phrases,
I realize that.我突然明白了,or 我意识到等等,使用这些词最多的人,受益最大.因为创造了coherence,这经历不再是零散的无关的片段.是一个连续的故事,现在我可以面对它了.
研究那些比别人健康的人,发现这些人:
Sense of coherence
People have the sense of coherence about their life,最确定的因素有3:
1. 理解力sense of comprehensibility—I understand the world.我感觉得到,我理解他the world,events,difficultie,hardships,highs and lows make sense to me mostly
2. sense of manageability.I can deal with it .I can handle it.I have the internal as well as external resources to deal with it as apposed to helpless.This is a sense of efficacy, of confidence being able to deal with hardships that arise.
3. sense of meaningfulness.困难的出现不是毫无意义的.意见不合不是坏事,可以更好地了解对方.更亲密了.我会从中成长,学到东西.
一种整体适应性(a global orientation that expresses external ,the extent to which one has a pervasive,enduring though dynamic feeling of confidenxe that )主要包括3方面(1)在生命中个体感受到来自内外部环境的压力是明确具体可预测的(即领悟性)
,the stimuli deriving from one’s internal and external environments in the course of living are structured,predictable and explicable(comprehensible)
(2) 个体感受到应对内外部环境的压力 所需资源是充分的
the resourse are available to one to meet the demands posed by these stimuli(internal resources and external resources:I can deal with it ,I can manage)
(3)个体感受到来自内外部环境的压力具有挑战性,值得花时间和精力去应对.these demands are challenges,worthy of investment and engagement(it’s meaningful)
对写日记的人来说,在日记里能找到这3点,有coherence.I can deal with it.I can handle it.
强烈推荐写日记.
总结改变这一课:ABC
Because habit is like a flood.会冲走一切。需结合ABand C.将这些变化引入我们的生活中。它们是内部相连的。
Goal setting:下面2节课讲目标的重要性,以及目标如何帮我们处理压力,how to 处理拖延问题,how to 变得更有效率.
目标设定:
1.Understand the theory and the practice of goal setting,
2.how to deal with stress
目标设定的重要性,不管是工作还是私生活,都应设定目标.
(1) 设定目标与工作效能的研究
(2) 设定目标与幸福的研究
设定目标的人往往掌控其它事也比较成功.目标.why?
因为目标能使我们专注,通常,我们四处奔波,不知道方向,就不可能达到目的地..专注能让我们找到方向.这能带来额外资源,内部和外部资源,帮助我们达成目的.
目标让我们更有幸福感,让我们更有适应能力.future-oriented(48;16s)
When we know what for,every how becomes possible.我们更能克服困难.
充分理解目标的正确作用:不是达到目标使人幸福,而是拥有目标使人幸福/
幸福不是登上山峰,也不是在山的周围没有方向地乱爬,幸福是向山峰攀登的过程,它与设定目标有关,and then let going and enjoying the process.作者: 轻纱曼舞 时间: 2012-10-30 07:25 标题: re:possitive psychology... possitive psychology(十一)
17.运动与冥想
21.Self-esteem,
High dependent Self-esteem Self-esteem that is not contigent on others A sense of self